For the second year in a row I managed to get to exactly NO sessions of the Newcastle Writers Festival (NWF). Now last year I had a vague idea it was coming up and then completely forgot about it until after the event. In fact, I think I might not have even be in Newcastle for it! This year I knew it was on, knew it was this weekend and even penciled in the sessions I wanted to attend.
Today the very last session of the NWF was “I Blog Therefore I Am” and I was really keen to hear what Linda Drummond and Summer Land had to say about blogging. We (the family) had taken time out to see my parents and I was all like “If I get to it, I get to it, but it’s no big deal.” That is, until I realised I could get to it but the timing would be close and the planets (and traffic lights) would have to align. I was five minutes late and the session was already full. Bugger! As I texted to Kirsty, “I missed it by that much.”
I think, in hindsight, my mistake was that I did only “pencil” this in to my schedule. Penciling things in is kind of like only half-committing to something. It’s like saying “Yeah, if I can I will, but…”. It’s like, “I’m going to lose weight, but I’m not going to tell anyone, or track what I’m eating.” (Guilty!) Frankly, when planning for the NWF I should have used a pen. Ink. Once you write something in ink, it cannot be changed*. You have committed to it and now you must follow through.
I must get in the mindset that if I want to do something, I commit to it. Go all in, as I am lead to believe poker players say. Not be all wishy-washy about it and then get my metaphorical knickers in a knot when I don’t follow through. I get the poops with myself and then I am no fun for anybody!
Today, I have nobody but myself to blame. I should have said, “I don’t want to miss this, we need to go now.” About 30 minutes before I did.
If you want something you must acknowledge that you want it and come to terms with the fact that it’s not selfish to want things for yourself sometimes. When you have made that acknowledgement, use your metaphoric (or literal) pen to commit to working towards what you want. When you openly say what you want, write it down or stick it in your Google calendar, you are saying to yourself (and the world, but mostly to yourself), I want this and I am going to do/get/have it.
I know I need to genuinely commit to stuff more often. When you want something do you really commit to it, or is it more “penciled in”?
*OK, I know you can use white out, but go with me!
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