“The central struggle of parenthood is to let our hopes for our children outweigh our fears.” This quote by Ellen Goodman is so true. I often find myself worrying about the “what ifs” and being a real helicopter parent. Then, my brain steps back and I worry about the opportunities they are missing out on by me always being overcautious!
My Dad tells stories of shooting slingshots at his mates and going on unsupervised camping and hunting trips as a kid. I remember wandering the bush on our farm and taking overnight hikes with my mates. I remember the first time my Mum let me cross the busy main road and go to the shop by myself.
The thought of my kids crossing roads unsupervised scares the daylights out of me. Then the thought of them still living at home when they are 30 scares me even more! I need to be brave so that my kids can learn to be brave. I don’t want to start today, but if not, when?
Today I am linking up with My Little Drummer Boys‘ Wordless Wednesday.
Nathan, when are we really ready to let them be brave by themselves? I know I’m not ready for that yet, but finding the balance between holding them back and letting them grow is a tough one.
We can only follow our hearts, I think.
Absolutely, Lisa. I don’t know when the right time will be, but I know I will know when it is… if that makes sense!
So true. I often think the same thing. Am I being too overprotective?
I often find myself feeling anxious about the kids doing stuff, often “new” stuff. If I think about it rationally (right…) it isn’t because I am afraid for them, so much as I want whatever they are doing to go well. And then, sometimes, I am just afraid… 🙂
Learning to let them take risks and make mistakes isn’t easy. I used to be quite a psycho parent, then about 2 years ago, just after baby three was born I realised it was killing me! Now I’m a ‘what’s the worst thing that can happen’ kinda parent, well most of the time!
I didn’t fully appreciate how much of a helicopter parent I was until I heard Michael McQueen speak at a work conference about the need to let kids do stuff. I was so embarrassed after the realisation, but it is a tough mindset to get yourself out of!
Such a great quote and so true.
Absolutely! Thanks for dropping by, Tamara.
Super quote .
Thanks Trish.
I love how you managed to compose such a thought provoking post on a wordless wednesday. I guess it is a consequence of this modern age where we know too much but we forget what is important. Free reign is what they need but it also depends on the individual child when we can trust them and when they are ready to cross the road alone. We can always walk a couple of steps behind them for a bit 😉
Thank you, Sarah. I totally agree, it depends on our individual children as to when they are ready to go off and do those things we fear them doing. Luckily, as their parents, we are in the best position to make that call!
I tend towards being over-cautious sometimes, yet other times I feel like people are looking at me thinking ‘you’re really going do let your kids do THAT?!’
Things are very different from when I was a kid. I guess it’s knowing your child and what you are comfortable with. I do think that being anxious rubs off on the child and makes them anxious to try new things too.
A parents worry never ends, even when they are 30 and still living at home I am guessing.
You’re right, Alicia, about the anxiety rubbing off. It is important to be brave so that your kids learn to be brave.